Autistic people thrive on routine, but those of us who also have ADHD can feel like we’re sabotaging ourselves by not sticking to one. I’ve found that many of the resources available for building better routines are focused on a capitalist idea of productivity. Personally, I had a routine where I found myself constantly overdoing it, out of concern for my productivity, to try to meet neurotypical expectations. After 30 years of that, I was great at getting work done, but not great at taking care of myself.

I can help work with you to build a routine that works with your brain and helps you meet your basic needs as an autistic person. (You know, like eating and sleeping.) Productivity is an unfortunate necessity to survive under capitalism, but trying to keep up with neurotypical expectations of productivity is unsustainable. I want to help you find ways to prioritize taking care of yourself first.

The way I see it, if a routine feels too hard to follow, that probably isn’t the routine for you. I’ll help you troubleshoot different methods to find routines that take minimal effort to follow.

Meltdowns and shutdowns are will always be something you have to deal with, as an AuDHD person. They’re never totally gone, because the unexpected will always happen.

That being said, they don’t have to be a frequent occurrence, and they don’t have to include self injurious behavior. Let’s utilize that autistic pattern recognition, and together we can help you figure out how to minimize their frequency and duration.

What activities help keep you regulated enough to avoid meltdowns/shutdowns? What activities are more likely to lead you to a meltdown/shutdown? I’ll work with you to help you find replacement behaviors for the self destructive, or property destructive things that may happen during a meltdown. I can also help you find ways that your family/friends/partner(s) can help you, especially at times you may find yourself semi-speaking or non-speaking.

Are you questioning whether you might be autistic and/or ADHD? Are you trying to figure out if a professional diagnosis is worth the time, money, and negative repercussions? (Did you just learn that there are negative repercussions for having an official diagnosis? There are, and it fucking sucks.) Do you want someone to help guide you to the right resources and information for the million questions you may have? Come talk to me!

Okay, so whether you’re professionally or self diagnosed, you’ve just learned you’re autistic and/or have ADHD. What do you do with this information? How do you use this information going forward? What changes should you make? What boundaries are you setting with people now? How do you even accommodate for yourself? How do you tell people- or should you even tell certain people?

I can help you pace yourself and prioritize the changes that will have the most beneficial impact. You’re going to be busy reevaluating your entire life through this new lens, and change isn’t easy for us, even if it’s good change. I can help you with some of the mental labor involved in learning how your brain works.

So, you’ve decided that you’re going to get an official autism assessment! Yay, but also YIKES- that’s such a stressful experience. Do you want some help getting organized before your assessment, from someone who has been through one herself? I’ll spend time helping you figure out what information will be helpful to your assessment, and I’ll help you find a way to organize it, so you can better advocate for yourself at your assessment.

Autistic masking is the reason so many of us go undiagnosed for so long. It takes a toll on our mental health, and many of us are left without a sense of who we are. For late diagnosed folks, it can be hard to know where the mask starts and the “real” us begins.

A lot of folks talk about learning to unmask completely, but being able to safely unmask in most situations is an extremely privileged position. For many BIPOC and Queer autistic folks, masking is a life or death thing. Your physical safety, and your ability to get and keep a job, are all dependent on how well you mask. Masking hurts us, but for those of us who can mask, it’s an unfortunate necessity in a world that doesn’t like us.

If you seek coaching with me for unmasking, I can help you find ways to try to unmask after a long day of masking. We can try to find healthy behaviors that will help you take the mask off when you don’t need it, and give your brain some of the rest it needs.